On Grief and Losing My Father

Rest in Peace to my father, Jack Wilson, Jr.
The greatest man I have ever known.

I have to talk about this. For my own sake. It’s helpful in allowing me to move forward. And it’ll probably explain the lack of posts these days.

In December of 2025, my Father was diagnosed with cancer. This news came while I was in Canada filming for a dream project that I’ve been working on. As I’ve often said to people, “Life happens whether you want it to or not.” There’s no convenient time to get bad news or have something happen that derails your meticulously laid plans. No, life will happen regardless. As a professional, I had to finish the job, but once I got back to New York, I took a couple of days to rest. I spent Christmas day alone, going over everything in my mind. The I went home to Mississippi the following day to see him and be with family. Talk about a sobering, sad time. My Dad had been battling Parkinson’s disease for years and now cancer? What the…?!

We met with his doctor in January of this year and she delivered further devastating news. He only had about 6-8 months to live. Given his physical condition, he would have been too weak to undergo any rigorous treatment options. Hearing my Mom’s voice crack as she pleaded with the doctor is one of the saddest moments I have ever witnessed and something I will never forget for as long as I live. It was devastating. We were all quiet after the meeting and, when conversation finally resumed, we were positive and made valiant attempts at optimism despite the finite nature of the news we received.

From that point it was all hands on deck. Everyone chipping in in their way to extend my Father’s life or at the least make his transition into passing as comfortable as we could. Things were looking great for a brief period. His appetite returned, he was eating more, complaining of pain less, and we expected he would be with us for at least the 6-8 months the doctor proposed. Sadly, it wasn’t meant to be.

My Father passed away suddenly on February 21st of this year. I was set to travel out of the country on February 24th to continue work on the aformentioned project so I was in the middle of preparations. I had spent the majority of the week planning and packing. I was excited to go, but I had this nagging feeling that if I left I would get some bad news by the time I returned.

It caught me off guard when my nephew messaged me and told me they had to rush him to the hospital. He suddenly stopped breathing and despite the hospital’s best efforts, he passed away. I was floored.

For those of you who haven’t lost a parent, I will say it’s one of the most surreal things you’ll experience in life. Parents are like unmoving, strong pillars in our lives. They seem to represent security, safety, and consistency in many ways. They’re literally there at the beginning of your life. It was odd to think I couldn’t just pick up the phone and call my Dad! Like, what?! No way…

Sensei and student.

You might gather from this post that my Dad and I were close. We definitely were. I am the youngest of three and, as a kid, I was sort of the runt of the litter. The smallest child by a wide margin. I was so small, my Dad thought I had some sort of medical condition and at one point considered taking me to a doctor for it.

Me with my brother and sister. I was tiny, but clearly the most stylish here.

Thankfully I would have a growth spurt in the 11th grade. My siblings are a year apart in age and grew up together. Since I was so much younger I was often by myself. So as a child, my Dad would take me everywhere with him. He would ride a bike around my hometown of Jackson, Mississippi and there I was, little Jamiya Wilson, on the back of the bike holding on while he took us on yet another adventure.

Pictured: my Father and I.

And that’s truly what it was like. Everyday with him was an adventure. And more importantly, and a testament to his legacy and the man he was, everyday was a lesson. I can’t recall one day that I’ve spent with my Dad that I didn’t learn something from the man. He was Mufasa and I was Simba. Every conversation, every errand to the store or a simple ride in the car would come with some little lesson, some nugget of wisdom. My Dad was amazing, in every sense of the word. Strong, smart, dedicated, innovative, resourceful, funny, cool, courageous, and badass. What a brilliant man.

Oh and was he stylish. Unless he was working, he was probably ‘suited and booted’.

After the news of his passing, I had to cancel my trip, inform all involved parties, and make arrangements to be home for his funeral. Funerals come so quickly, it’s hard to emotionally prepare for them. And one of this magnitude? I worried I would be an emotional mess. Yet despite the situation, there was a peace building within me. I just wanted to be there for my family, for my Mom especially. My beautiful, strong, courageous Mom. She needed us more than anything, so the focus was less on my own feelings and more about helping my Mom navigate such a tough time in her life(I’m sure my siblings feel similarly). They were married for 50 years! So you can imagine how devastated and lost she must have felt then(and still as I write this).

A proud father and, equally, a proud husband. He and my mom were together 50 years!

We had a private viewing ceremony before the actual funeral. I was quite nervous about it admittedly, but once I got there and saw my Dad laying there in the casket, at rest, I felt a wave of mixed emotions. Of course a lot of sadness, but there was a sense of relief. And happiness?! I was happy he could be at peace now. I know that’s a weird sentiment to have when someone passes, but I really felt for my Dad in the later years of his life. He was someone so vibrant, full of energy and vitality. He would light up a room with his charisma. He was funny, loved to talk, loved to share music, and made everyone feel welcome. We’d regularly stay up to 5 in the morning just chatting about literally any topic.

Once he was diagnosed with Parkinson’s his movement got restricted. His body was often very stiff and unable to function without assistance. Before his passing, it was also getting to the point where he couldn’t speak as clearly as he once did. Everything was becoming a struggle for him. There were moments, I’m sure, where I know his pride was hurt. He couldn’t be himself anymore and that must have been so hard.

So to see him finally at rest after all that’s been stripped away from him in his later years, I was happy for him. Hopefully in the next place, he’s grinning and chatting it up with some of his old friends and family members.

The funeral occurred a couple of days later and of course it was a rollercoaster of emotions for everyone. He was a very well respected and beloved person in our little world and in the community so there were a lot of people in attendance and a whole lot of love in the room. I’m sure he would have smiled at that. Even the sun came out that day and blessed us with beautiful warm weather and clear skies. There was something poetic and touching about his send off.

After the funeral we gathered at my parent’s home and had dinner with family. It was a fun time with lots of laughs, reminiscing on good times and taking solace in our faith and knowing everything would be okay. It was also great to see how many people showed up for my Mom. She’s given so much to her family over the years so it was nice to see that reciprocated.

I stayed home for a few days then eventually returned to New York. Feeling empty.

It all happened so fast I don’t think I had time to really process it. Understandably, I took some time off from work just to get my bearings and make sure I was in the right headspace. My clients were all very supportive and understanding during this time as well as friends when I shared the news on social media. I didn’t want to rush back because I’ve dealt with grief quite a few times in my life.

“Grief is like a weight that you carry but you never know just how heavy it will be. Some days it feels light as a feather and some days it feels like carrying a boulder up a hill in the rain. And you never know when it will hit. One minute you’re happy, the next you see or hear something that reminds you of them and you’re an emotional mess.”

What I’ve found interesting during my grieving period, is how people responded. Some were very empathetic and understanding of such a loss. Or at the very least they felt concerned for me and having to go through it. I received some very touching messages from people I didn’t expect. Others who I expected more from, acted as if it wasn’t a big deal. Maybe because of hangups with their own parents. But while I was dealing with one of the saddest moments in my life, it was surprising people I thought were close, would reach out and somehow make it about them. Or nag me about some insignificant things in the midst of a family crisis. The gal of people sometimes. I didn’t say anything, but I’ll never forget it. Sometimes things happen in life to show you who’s really with you.

If you’re dealing with grief, talk to people you can trust or those who have proven themselves to be good listeners. Sometimes you just need to talk to someone. To vent, to laugh, or just to be hear. Consider grief counseling if going to a professional feels more comfortable. Just don’t sit there struggling with all those confusing emotions if you can avoid it. It’s a heavy burden to carry at times. Having some help to cope with it is a blessing.

I spoke at the funeral and in my speech I talked about how we should honor my father and his legacy. Given how close we were I just know what he would say if he saw me sulking around the house, moping, being all sad, angry, feeling sorry for myself.

“Alright son, you’ve cried enough. Find something to do. You’re doing good. Keep on pushin’.” He would say in his authoritative voice.

So I took some time to myself, remembered the good times, the emotional ones, the regrettable ones, all of it. I spent several days in isolation. I had really good cry when I heard the song Keep on Pushin’ (one of my Dad’s favorites) by The Impressions. I let all the emotions out, dusted myself off, and got back on the horse.

During that time, a person very dear to me reached out and consoled me. She suggested coming to visit soon and it was right on time. I needed a friend, the company, and to get my mind back on track. I can’t thank her enough. God sends angels when you least expect it.

Fast forward to today and as I pen this, the rush of emotions come back like before. The death of a parent is never an easy thing to talk about or wrap one’s head around, especially when you were close. In my life, my Dad was like the Sun. Losing him feels like I’ve lost a part of myself. Like the world isn’t right anymore.

However, in that sadness I feel, there’s hope. No matter how gloomy the emotions get, there’s always this light cutting through the darkness that keeps me going. There’s determination. There’s a renewed sense of purpose. There’s security in knowing I have another angel looking over me.

If your parents are still in your life, give them a hug, tell them how much you love them. Give them their flowers while they’re here.

“To my Dad,

Thank you for all you gave. To your people, your community, your family, and to me. All the talks, all the laughs, all the history you shared, all the lessons(even when I stubbornly didn’t want to hear them) have proven invaluable on my life’s journey. You gave me everything I need.

All you sacrificed to ensure I had a good, safe, and productive upbringing won’t be for naught. I will honor your legacy by becoming the man you always knew I could be.

I love you and we’ll meet again on the other side. I’ll have a lot of great stories to tell you.”

— Your son, Jamiya

Love you Pop. Till we meet again.

I’ll be back to posting on a more regular basis from now on. Likely twice a month. More if inspiration strikes me. I have a big announcement coming in May along with some other exciting plans so I’ll be working quietly over here the next couple of weeks. It’s good to be back.

Thank you for reading.

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Musings: January 15, 2026

The Pillar of Strength © Jamiya Wilson Studio, 2025
One of my favorites images from last year with fantastic model and friend Emma Helena.
Images like this are why I now consider myself solely a portrait and fine art nude photographer.

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NEW BEGINNINGS

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Well hello 2026.

Another year begins which opens opportunities for fresh starts, new beginnings, and new relationships. 2025 was a very interesting year for me. It started with a bang, lulled a bit in the summer, then ramped up again in the fall. It was fraught with emotional moments, sad goodbyes, tear jerking happy moments, and countless surprises. I’ve taken time away from posting not only due to my work schedule but I’ve also been dealing with some personal issues I’ll detail in a future post. Still processing things at the moment, so bear with me. I’m human.

As the first musings post of the year, this one kicks us off with announcements and details about the overall direction for the year. Not only are things changing rapidly in my own life, but all over the world. How do we as artists navigate an ever changing(and ever shrinking) landscape? I hope to have more answers to that question as the year progresses, so stay tuned.

For now, enjoy the first musings of the year.

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RECENT PHOTOGRAPHS

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Model: Layana Devis @layanadevis
Studio: L’Atelier & Beyond Studio @latelierandbeyond_studio
Location: Paris, France

ALL IMAGES SHOT ON THE SONY A7RV + SONY FE 28-70MM F/2 GM

Just one photo this week. I’m still working on images from this set, but this is from my first shoot with the stunning Lana aka Layana Devis. She’s quickly becoming one of my favorite models to work with whenever I’m in Paris. Beautiful features, a friendly demeanor, and always up for shooting, she has been a pleasure to work with.

This image was captured on the Sony 28-70 f/2 GM lens. A lens which I’ve pondered selling from time to time, but I find it irreplaceable for my portrait work. I covered an event at the end of 2025 and didn’t find the focal range as pleasant when compared to the 24-70. Having the 24 on the wide end is still extremely useful so I own both. 28-70 for portrait work, 24-70 for events and video. The 28-70 is my go to for portraits since it essentially replaces a bunch of primes I’d use such as the 35mm or 50mm options. Love the output from this lens.

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GEAR TALK

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The Sony FX3 Is Still The Camera To Beat

The Sony FX3. Been around 5 years and still #1.

The Sony FX3 is still one of, if not the best, video cameras on the market.

I’m currently working on a documentary project(details coming soon) which was greenlit in July 2025. At the time, I didn’t own a dedicated video camera. Already being in the Sony ecosystem, the FX3 was the logical choice for me. However, I did compare it to other available options and honestly none of them appealed to me as much. Panasonic has their S1II’s, Canon has the R5 Mark II and the recent C50, and Nikon came out with their ZR at the end of 2025. All great options but lacking in some area for me. With Panasonic, form factor and company dependability. I shot Panasonic for years and the lack of innovation and/or haste in getting out new products(especially lenses) left me with a sour taste in my mouth. So Panasonic is a no go. Further, I’ve also have been studying the image from Panasonic’s recent cameras and I don’t find it as pleasing as I once did. It looks “waxy” to me. Canon has impressive options, but is expensive and I didn’t want to invest in a completely different system unless it offered substantial benefits over what I have. Plus the C50 doesn’t have IBIS which won’t work for my application. The Nikon ZR looks cool, but isn’t suited for this sort of work. It’s more a prosumer camera than a true workhorse like the aforementioned options. It lacks much of the customization options on the body that more pro level cameras have. Plus, I don’t like Nikon’s colors.

So after all the comparisons, the Sony Fx3 still came out on top for me. The biggest advantage it has over ALL the others, is low-light performance. Shooting doc work, you’ll often find yourself in less than ideal lighting scenarios, so it helps to have a camera that can still produce a clean image even with abnormally low lighting conditions. Add in the small form factor, the amount of buttons and dials I can customize, and I have a camera I can truly call my own. After changing most of the default settings, it actually feels like “my camera”. There are still some odd Sony design philosophy quirks that nag me, but overall I find it a pleasant system to use. It will remain my main camera for the duration of this documentary project. Once it’s completed maybe I’ll consider other options, but for now, it’s been bliss working with the FX3.

Long live this amazing little camera.

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NEW DIRECTIONS

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One of my earliest(and still favorite) beauty images. Fun and frustrating times that era was.

In 2026, I’m saying goodbye to both beauty and swimwear as genres I’m focused on. For those who wish to see that work, you can see it in the Archive menu in the site’s main navigation.

Why abandon beauty photography?

“But Jamiya, you’ve put so much work into it!” I know. However, unless it’s for a commercial client, I’m not interested in shooting beauty. It doesn’t inspire me. I could care less about makeup, hair looks, etc. None of it draws my attention anymore and it lacks the emotional depth and intrigue I can create with portrait photography.

Swimwear was really fun, but time to move on.

Why abandon swimwear photography?

There’s no money in it. It’s fun to shoot beautiful women in beautiful locations. But since the rise of social media, influencer culture, etc. there’s really not a lot of money to be earned shooting swimwear. Brands aren’t hiring photographers for it in droves like they used to. Instead they’re bringing much of it in house. Influencers/models are shooting themselves just to post quick pictures on their stories. And the photos are more than “good enough”. There are about 3-5 photographers I know of that make a decent living shooting swimwear alone. And half of them have to do other things like weddings(*shudder) alongside their swimwear work in order to earn well. So while fun, it’s not moving the needle forward for me in any significant way to warrant focusing on long-term.

Will I ever shoot those other genres again?

Sure! I certainly will if I have an idea or something inspires me. If I just want to go to Miami and shoot swimwear for fun, I’ll definitely do it. Or hit the streets of Tokyo for some street photography, I’m with it. Those genres just aren’t mainstays in my portfolio like they used to be. And I won’t market/promote myself as a photographer in those genres. I don’t want any potential clients getting confused about the style of work I generally offer. Anything outside of portraits and nudes is more of a special case and quoted accordingly.

Where is all this going?

Essentially I’m starting fresh and reinventing myself as an artist. I don’t think some of my older work still serves me, so instead of clinging on to successes of the past, it’s time to embrace the future and focus on the next chapter of my career. On the photography front, I now consider myself simply a portrait and fine art nude photographer. I’m focused on making striking, compelling portraits of people outside of the scope of just shooting with models/actors. I want writers, poets, politicians, musicians, philosophers, CEO’s, etc. This new focus allows me to hone my efforts and really refine my marketing going forward. It also frees up precious time to step more fully into filmmaking and make that a more extensive part of my repertoire.

I want my portfolio going forward to be: Portraits, Nudes, Film/Video.

Expect small changes to happen on the website over the next month as I make the transition. Archiving the old work was step one. Now it’s time to fill out my portfolio a bit with more recent work and make creative projects plans for the year.

Sigh, my job is never done.

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LESS BLOGGING, MORE WORKING

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I won’t be blogging as much this year. Instead my focus will be on working more, improving my style, and growing my business. Blogging isn’t a huge part of my business strategy. It’s more of a place for me to share announcements, thoughts on things, but with minimal engagement it’s not worth wasting useful hours writing posts. 15 years ago, blogging was all the rage. People would actually read, engage in comments sections, etc. But now? Across the web, you’ll see many photography blogs are ghost towns. Comment sections use to be full of insightful discussions, now there are only a handful of comments. The web has shifted more to social media and YouTube and even on those platforms, unless the focus is on gear, engagement isn’t what it once was. Such is the times ya know?

If you’re sensing a theme, I’ll spell it out: I‘m focusing my time on things that excite me and yield greater results for my business. If it takes up too much time, offers little return, and/or I don’t enjoy it, it’s out.

So I’ll still blog occasionally if you’re into that, just not as frequently. 1-2 per month seems sufficient. Maybe I’ll share more from my travels as well. We’ll see!

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IN CLOSING

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I feel it’s important for artists to take greater control over their careers. If you don’t want to do a certain type of work, don’t. Figure out another way. Don’t allow yourself to be pigeon-holed into a miserable existence working on stuff that doesn’t stir your soul. Life is far too short to be wasted on things that demotivate us. Seek out clients/customers who love what you do. Sure it may be more niche, perhaps come with less fanfare, but at least you’re being authentic to yourself. For years I’ve pondered stepping away from beauty in a more official capacity and now I’ve made it so. It feels a bit odd letting go of something you worked on for years, but I’m not one to linger on past successes. I’m seeking deeper, more enriching challenges that make me excited to photograph. In time it will make sense, for now I feel liberated.

Here’s to the new year! May it bring more happy and exciting moments for us all!

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Olivia Linz at Ape Studios in Barcelona II

Model savant, Olivia Linz.

Another set of images from my shoot with model phenom Olivia Linz at Ape Studios in Barcelona.

This set is non-nude for you prudes out there.

I think I’ve really come to find my style as a portrait photographer. From composition to the tones used in my black-and-white work, I feel that my eye is becoming more refined and more easily identifies the elements I prefer to see in my images. And with a faster, more precise regularity. I no longer spend hours in post-production being indecisive about a look for a particular image. The decisions come quicker and in turn, I’m able to release work at a greater pace than in the past. Being indecisive was paralyzing me for a bit, I must admit. Here’s to being on the right track!

As for these images, what I love about them is how soft and feminine they are. Olivia brings this sort of delicate, graceful feel that softens the mood, making the images feel more personal or candid than overly posed, produced images. A more relaxed, candid feel is what I love to see in my portrait work, so I think we accomplished our mission here.

Closing thoughts at the end of this post. Hope you enjoy this set!

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PHOTOGRAPHS

Model: Olivia Linz @oliivaa_linz
Studio: Ape Studios @apestudi0s
Location: Barcelona, Spain

ALL IMAGES SHOT ON THE SONY A7RV + SONY FE 85MM f/1.4 GM II AND SONY FE 28-70 f/2 GM LENS

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IN CLOSING

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The three images at the end are some of my favorites. I like images with dramatic highlights and shadows. Many portrait photographers prefer dim, overcast days with even lighting. Personally, I’ve always preferred sunny days for portraits as having the sun gives me a wider variety of looks I can achieve. I can place the subject directly facing the sun, or with the sun to their back for some cool backlighting effects. If I want a more overcast look, I can move them under an overhang so the light’s less harsh and more even. The sun also gives the images a punchier, snappier look that I prefer. We don’t run from the sun, we embrace it!

I was recently in Paris and Olivia and I got the opportunity to work together again. I’m excited to release images from that shoot as well as scenes from a video test we did. You really get a sense of who she is as a person and how talented of a model she is when you see her in motion. We just walked around Paris, hanging out and chatting, but the footage feels so full of life and excitement, you’d think you were watching a movie. Can’t wait to share those!

With that in mind, I’m fully committed to my direction into being a filmmaker. I turned 40 back in March, and that not only was a personal milestone, it gave me perspective on where I’d like my career to be in the next five years. By 45, I see myself as more of a hybrid artist, doing both photography and filmmaking in equal measure. I’ve given so much of my life to photography already, so going forward I’m shifting my focus to directing and writing for film projects. Shooting video content has definitely been frustrating at times, but it’s also been more exciting than creating photographs in many ways. It feels more accurate to the portrayal of life than the single still image, if that makes sense. But I adore photography and will never walk away from it. We’re just splitting our focus. Say 60% photography, 40% filmmaking.

Another thank you to Olivia, and all the models I’ve had the pleasure of shooting with this year. They’ve helped elevate my art to such a degree and now I feel ready to tackle even greater projects.

If I have seen further than others, it is by standing upon the shoulders of giants.
- Isaac Newton

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Rebirth of the Bird at L’Atelier & Beyond Studio in Paris

Claire

I’m headed to Paris tomorrow for probably the last time this year. So in honor of that, here are some portraits I did with model, Claire aka RebirthoftheBird. A brilliant model, Claire has one of the most intense gazes I’ve ever seen, drawing immediate comparisons to alluring actresses like Penelope Cruz or Eva Green. Her look could cut glass! Can’t wait to shoot with her again.

These were taken at my favorite studio in Paris, L’Atelier & Beyond. It was the first studio I’d worked in in Paris and it remains my favorite to this day. Not only for the space itself, but the friendly staff. I consider the owner, Karine, a good friend. She always takes care of me and rolls out the red carpet whenever I’m in town for shoots. It feels like “my space”, a space where I can create at my best. The light feels right and the rustic backgrounds are reminiscent of old Paris. We often talk about gear feeling right to use, but I’ll take that notion farther and apply it to places as well. There are just some places where I feel my creativity can flourish and this is one such space. Honorable mentions being the studios I frequent in Düsseldorf and Prague. Paris as a whole always leaves me feeling inspired. Walking the streets and visiting the places frequented by artistic legends from Picasso to Avedon or Dior to Saint Laurent, fills me with a zest for creating and enjoying the process I don’t get anywhere else.

Closing thoughts at the end of this post. Hope you enjoy this set!

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PHOTOGRAPHS

Model: Rebirth of the Bird @rebirthof.thebird
Studio: L’Atelier & Beyond @latelierandbeyond_studio
Location: Paris, France

ALL IMAGES SHOT ON THE SONY A7RV + SONY FE 85MM f/1.4 GM II AND SONY FE 28-70 f/2 GM LENS

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My favorite photo from this set. I told you, her look can cut glass. The intensity!

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IN CLOSING

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This set of images utilized a different approach to post-production than I’ve previously used. Usually I would edit the original in color then convert it to black-and-white in Capture One. However, I’ve found that Capture One alters the RAW image very differently than a .TIFF or .PSD file. Colors and/or tones don’t look the same. So I’m looking at my finished works and they don’t quite have the punch as my adjustments on the RAW files within Capture One.

To outline the old process: Global adjustments in Capture One > Export as a TIFF > Retouch in Photoshop > Bring final TIFF back into Capture One > Apply chosen Style of Preset > Export JPEG at various sizes for desired medium (e.g. social media, website, etc.)

The new process: Global adjustments in Capture One > Apply chosen style of preset > Export as a TIFF > Retouch in Photoshop > Bring final TIFF back into Capture One > Export JPEG at various sizes for desired medium (e.g. social media, website, etc.)

Below are two examples. The image on the left utilizes the old process, the image on the right uses the new process.

New process
Accurate color, contrast, and tones applied to the RAW file in Capture One.

Old process
Notice how faded it looks or the flatness of the white background?

The only downside is, I have to commit to a look. The old process would allow me to get both a black-and-white and color version of the same photo. This new method requires me to commit to one or the other. Or process both a black-and-white and color version which will have to be retouched independently. It’s more work, but yields a higher quality result overall. I’m still tinkering, but wanted to share my findings.

As for the shoot, it was a chill and fun vibe. I like my sessions to be low-stress affairs where people can come in, chat, chill, and create. This is not a high-pressure fashion campaign, but more of a personal, intimate setting which often results in portraits that feel relaxed and most importantly, authentic. As mentioned, I have more to come from this session, but hope you enjoyed these. Not every group of photos I post will be 15-20 image epics. Sometimes it’s just a handful. And sometimes, that’s enough.

Hope you enjoyed this post! Feel free to leave your thoughts and comments below!

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Musings: October 31, 2025

Unattractive actress Sydney Sweeney at Variety’s Power of Women Event

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INTRO

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Happy Halloween! Can you believe Fall is already here? 2025 has gone by so quickly! It seems like yesterday I was just celebrating my birthday and now it’s Halloween! Crazy.

My apologies for the lack of posts these past months. I needed to shift focus for a bit as I prepare for a project. Sometimes it’s good to step away, focus on something in order to improve, then come back to something else. In this case, the blog. Don’t get me wrong, I love posting here. However, this is more of a therapeutic, creative outlet for me where I share my thoughts, plans, and other things I’m interested in. Money isn’t the motivator, so I write and post at my leisure. I also don’t want money to be the main incentive for writing on the blog as I don’t want to get roped into doing reviews and shilling camera products.

No, the blog will remain a platform for my thoughts and ideas. Sort of a look into my mind so maybe you’ll understand me better as an artist and to an extent, a person. I value authenticity and going against the grain. Let the others shill gear for camera companies, be overly PC, or not share they’re true feelings about a topic, we do things different over here.

On to this week’s musings!

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IN THE DEFENSE OF BOMBSHELLS:
SYDNEY SWEENEY EDITION

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Ugh, hideous.

Sydney Sweeney is one of the most brilliant actresses of this generation. Beautiful and talented. Ever the provocateur, from her American Eagle ad that stirred “controversy” earlier this year and now this silver sheer dress reminiscent of the draped fabrics used in the famous sculptures of Michelangelo. She knows how to turn heads and stay in the headlines in both a simultaneously subtle yet in your face way. It’s racy without overdoing it, sexy and unapologetic so. I particularly like how she makes a certain contingent of people seethe for committing the crime of being attractive and existing. For not listening to the haters or those jealous of her figure, refusing to shut herself away and act ashamed of who she is. For refusing to engage in politics and feed into the oh so tiring political discourse in modern day America.

For leaning into her sex appeal. And for understanding that men find her attractive and not being appalled at the thought. A refreshing sight in the west, where anything catered to men is seen as(what some odd looking liberal arts grad in New York may tell me), “Patriachy” “Misogyny”, “Sexist” or some other dismissive criticism lobbied at what they deem as the “male gaze”.

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It’s an odd, contradictory time of supposedly sexually liberated and opened minded people who screech in disapproval when someone attractive is getting praise and attention. Especially when it’s a woman(in this particular case, a white woman - which they especially hate) eliciting attention from men. Because as we know, men aren’t allowed to like attractive women(and in turn women aren’t allowed to like men) anymore or have preferences. And yet, that seems to be the lifeblood of modern social media. Attractive women in grand locations, fancy restaurants, showcasing often form-fitting clothing sent by corporate sponsors, etc. What a contradiction to clamor for this sort of content but respond like a prudish nun whenever certain women garner attention from men.

When it comes to Sydney Sweeney, what are you so afraid of? Does she bring out your insecurities? Given how so many people act as evangelists regarding therapy, maybe you should see a therapist. That’s some pretty heavy baggage you’re dealing with there.

Sweeney is no different than other bombshells of the past from Marilyn Monroe, Sophia Loren, Jayne Mansfield, Angelina Jolie, Pam Grier, Farrah Fawcett, Pamela Anderson, Halle Berry, Vivica Fox, Kate Upton, Monica Belluci, Salma Hayek, Lea Seydoux, Eva Green, Scarlett Johansson, Sharon Stone, Denise Richards, Carmen Electra, Kim Kardashian, and the lists goes on. Women who embrace their looks and sexuality, flaunt it in a tongue and cheek sort of way, and have fun doing it. I like bombshells, sue me.

Her existence and this dress wouldn’t have been a problem in the 90s:

Rose McGowan’s dress at the 1998 MTV Video Music Awards

Or in the 2000s:

Jennifer Lopez’s dress at the 2000 Grammy Awards.

Or in the 2010s:

Rihanna’s dress at the 2014 CFDA Fashion Awards.

But today she’s basically representative of the third reich according to some unhinged types.

Oh no! It’s Nazi propaganda!

It’s lame. Stop hating. You look and sound jealous.

The girl’s hot. The dress is cool and she looks beautiful in it, like it was made for her.

She’s likely this generation’s Marilyn Monroe and I’d love to shoot with her someday.

I also think she should reach out to comic artist, J. Scott Campbell and talk to him about producing a Danger Girl live-action film. You know, one of those campy but sexy spy thrillers like Charlie’s Angels. She’d be perfect. And Hollywood could use a win.

Sydney Sweeney as Abbey Chase in Danger Girl?! I should work in casting.

Sydney have your people contact my people. Cool dress by the way!

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RECENT PHOTOGRAPHS

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Model: Emma Helena @riel.life
Studio: Studio Stadtwald @studiostadtwald
Location: Düsseldorf, Germany

ALL IMAGES SHOT ON THE SONY A7RV + SONY FE 28-70MM F/2 GM

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A couple of new images featuring model Emma Helena. I took these in Düsseldorf months ago and they’re probably my favorite set all year. There are so many great options to choose from, it’s overwhelming. The more I learn about myself as an artist, the more I realize what visual elements I like to consistently see in my work. Balanced framing, pleasing composition, sharp lines, and emotive expressions. I feel I’m improving with each shoot, but now it’s more about defining “my work”. Who is Jamiya as an artist? After years of shooting beauty photography, then pivoting to portrait and nude work, I’ve really started to find myself.

Though I’ve enjoyed this exploratory journey, I also feel like it’s time to reach a destination. So my focus has been refining my style, testing different looks, all in hopes of getting to a place of contentment. I guess that’s folly as art is often a lifelong pursuit with constant learning and refinement, but I want to feel like, “This style is me.” if you get what I mean.

Hope you like these!

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GEAR TALK

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The New Sony FE 100mm f/2.8 Macro GM Lens

The Sony FE 100mm f/2.8 Macro GM Lens. Can’t wait for this lens to arrive.

Not much to report on the gear front. I’ve been using the same lenses for most of the year and have been more than happy with their performance. I squeal with glee every time I see shots from the 85mm f/1.4 GM II lens or how I rarely remove my 50-150 f/2 GM Lens(it does 95% of my work these days). The lenses are so good for what I do, I’m just free to focus on what I’m creating. But there’s one missing.

About a month ago, Sony unveiled the upcoming Sony FE 100mm f/2.8 Macro GM Lens. I used to favor the Sigma 105 f/2.8 DG DN Macro Art Lens(a great lens), but have since gone with a mostly all first-party lineup and sold all my third-party glass except one, the Tamron 20-40 f/2.8, which I use for vlogging. I do miss the Sigma macro lens, but now that Sony’s announced this, my kit can be complete. I finally have all the things! This lens will mainly be used for video, but will see occassional use on photoshoots.

It’s great to whip out a specialty lens from time to time to get something unique. The 100mm focal length is also a change as Sony’s premium Macro lens in the past has mainly been 90mm. I prefer 100mm+ for a general purpose macro lens. Or something longer like 150mm when shooting macro beauty images for example.

I’ll also be using this lens on my upcoming project. Which leads me to…

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I’M MAKING A MOVIE

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Hence the lack of updates on the blog over the past few months.

Begin November 22nd I’ll begin work on a documentary film I’ve been planning for about 4 months now. Since it will be my first project of this scale, it has required extensive planning, research, testing of various equipment, and there’s still loads to do ahead of the first day of filming. Unlike photoshoots, film productions have so many more layers to them. It’s vitally important to be as organized as possible as it’s easy to overlook a small detail that can make all the difference in the final product. So I’ve been giving the film my undivided attention.

I’ll share details when I’m able to speak more publicly about it, but for now I’m excited and can’t wait to begin filming. More things to come!

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I NEED YOUR PHOTOGRAPHY QUESTIONS

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As I’ve mentioned branching out into YouTube and having my own workshop eventually, I’m looking for questions from photographers regarding portrait photography. What are some of the things you would like to learn or know more about? Leave a comment below or shoot me a message on Instagram. I want to compile a fairly comprehensive list as I build the curriculum for the workshop and come up with topics for tutorial posts. Your contributions will be much appreciated!

Hope you enjoyed this post! Feel free to leave your thoughts and comments below!

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